Why do we play hide and seek with happiness? Why is it the answer is always a another question away? Why is it we often seem lonely but happiness depends on another if only when the truth of the matter is: If we knew how to be happy we would be.
Happiness is unreliable. Seek what is meaningful, not happiness. Happiness will more likely follow but if it doesn’t, you will still have what is meaningful.
True, Alan, but does that presuppose that what’s meaningful never changes for an individual? If what’s meaningful does change, then how is chasing the meaningful different from chasing happiness?
Good question, Paul. Forced me to think through it. Not sure if I succeeded. I think when we figure out what is meaningful for ourselves, we intend it to be permanent. We are willing to sacrifice for it. It entails responsibility. It is high on our hierarchy of values. We know it is 'true' or has value independent of our personal satisfaction and we don't make it conditional on whether or not it makes us happy, then give up when it doesn't. If we do, then the thing wasn't very meaningful, was it? Like a fair weather friendship. At the same time, a change of a kind might be necessary due to forces beyond our control, despite our intentions. A crisis of faith, so to speak. One is dedicated to a truth, not for its utility, but because of its transcendent significance. It might be in God, marriage / family, friendship, art, 'social justice' one's country, what have you. Then a force comes along and destroys it, tries to remove the meaning it once held. Any one of those, you might have stood up for, sacrificed, suffered, even paid the ultimate price, but the particular instantiation of it is gone, the friend betrays, the talent is lost, God forsakes as he is wont to do, one's government is irredeemably corrupt etc. These happen, but if it is meaningful, one still believes in friendship, the reality of a higher power, the potential of one's country etc. That's what ultimately sustains, not the happiness you might have had along the way. I suppose if I consider this semantically, I want to say that 'happiness' is subjectively determined, always relative, while meaning is objective, out there, with an absolute significance. With that in mind, the latter might bring happiness, but is still around if it does not. Which means, yes, I would agree, simply changing what is meaningful, as you ask, would be to render it a purely subjective thing, offering no transcendence, and not really different from 'happiness'. Sorry to go on and on, but I hope this makes some sense.
The ultimate questions. And at the same time, the ones that never catch us as they fly by…
The question “why” rarely has answers (except regarding gravity). It is a poor question to be sure.
In order to find what “it” is, we must ask the better questions… something like. “What is the thought I must remove to be content?” Or “what action could I take to move me a bit closer to happiness?” And then, perhaps.. what is preventing me from doing those? Often times fear shows its ugly face.
An excellent, thought evoking poem Paul.
And in the spirit of asking outrageous questions, Can one request a poem?
WHY ? Because we don't know HOW to SEARCH, or at least do " better ", OR some dark, Stygian reptilian part of us subconsciously enjoys slipping & falling on our keisters, possibly.
I try to imagine happiness. To wander in its presence. To feel its warmth. To know its shelter and shade. It’s usually aspirational, but sometimes, and usually accidentally, it arrives as a gift from another. Last night held one those moments… it felt simultaneously old, and ancient, and childlike, and fleeting. We know… it’s a gift, borne by others, and is the most precious thing. We don’t find it, now and again, it finds us, in spite of everything, and smiles. I hope it finds you, even if only for a moment… I hope it does.
We are happy and perfect, Paul. But we have to learn to listen to that part of us that’s NOT our mind or intellect *to continue* to be happy. In other words, we have to uncondition ourselves from the layers wrapped around us by our thoughts, emotions, all those reactive moments in life and listen to our inner wise guide. Then, we will relish the neutral state of our Self we were born with and before we started overthinking. Happiness is in being in a neutral state to the world:) Vedanta calls it “sakshi” or the witnessing consciousness.
what can always be... what we are... accept what we are... love what we are... even if we don't know what we are... thank you Paul for your overwhelming beauty always
We know how to be happy. Happy is not same as a life of pleasure or hedonism. A deep happiness is freeing and it comes from work of meaning + having gratitude + not giving pain so much importance by holding it or suppressing it. It really is something we can resolve to: just do it.
Happiness is unreliable. Seek what is meaningful, not happiness. Happiness will more likely follow but if it doesn’t, you will still have what is meaningful.
True, Alan, but does that presuppose that what’s meaningful never changes for an individual? If what’s meaningful does change, then how is chasing the meaningful different from chasing happiness?
Good question, Paul. Forced me to think through it. Not sure if I succeeded. I think when we figure out what is meaningful for ourselves, we intend it to be permanent. We are willing to sacrifice for it. It entails responsibility. It is high on our hierarchy of values. We know it is 'true' or has value independent of our personal satisfaction and we don't make it conditional on whether or not it makes us happy, then give up when it doesn't. If we do, then the thing wasn't very meaningful, was it? Like a fair weather friendship. At the same time, a change of a kind might be necessary due to forces beyond our control, despite our intentions. A crisis of faith, so to speak. One is dedicated to a truth, not for its utility, but because of its transcendent significance. It might be in God, marriage / family, friendship, art, 'social justice' one's country, what have you. Then a force comes along and destroys it, tries to remove the meaning it once held. Any one of those, you might have stood up for, sacrificed, suffered, even paid the ultimate price, but the particular instantiation of it is gone, the friend betrays, the talent is lost, God forsakes as he is wont to do, one's government is irredeemably corrupt etc. These happen, but if it is meaningful, one still believes in friendship, the reality of a higher power, the potential of one's country etc. That's what ultimately sustains, not the happiness you might have had along the way. I suppose if I consider this semantically, I want to say that 'happiness' is subjectively determined, always relative, while meaning is objective, out there, with an absolute significance. With that in mind, the latter might bring happiness, but is still around if it does not. Which means, yes, I would agree, simply changing what is meaningful, as you ask, would be to render it a purely subjective thing, offering no transcendence, and not really different from 'happiness'. Sorry to go on and on, but I hope this makes some sense.
I’m inclined to agree with you, Alan, from the standpoint that one tends to be happier the more meaningful one finds life to be.
Happiness, like any other emotion, is just a moment in time.
And no moment can last forever. Thank you, Grace!
So glad this is true! 💕
If you keep the search going internally then one can inch closer and closer. It’s not out there.
I think that’s true, Charles. It also seems to be something we keep inventing obstacles to prevent us from achieving.
It’s something I’ve been working on for decades.
The ultimate questions. And at the same time, the ones that never catch us as they fly by…
The question “why” rarely has answers (except regarding gravity). It is a poor question to be sure.
In order to find what “it” is, we must ask the better questions… something like. “What is the thought I must remove to be content?” Or “what action could I take to move me a bit closer to happiness?” And then, perhaps.. what is preventing me from doing those? Often times fear shows its ugly face.
An excellent, thought evoking poem Paul.
And in the spirit of asking outrageous questions, Can one request a poem?
Maybe beginning with Do I dare…..
Wow! Great response, Teyani!
Ps… thanks for the inspiration you offered in this poem.. I just wrote a post about “Why”
This poem has a powerful ending and everything leads to that and totally depends upon it being just right, and you've nailed it. Nice work!
Thank you, Martin.
WHY ? Because we don't know HOW to SEARCH, or at least do " better ", OR some dark, Stygian reptilian part of us subconsciously enjoys slipping & falling on our keisters, possibly.
Thanks for your thoughts on this, Daniel.
As a student - practitioner of Zen AND Sufism, these subjects are ones I meditate on with a certain degree of regularity.
I try to imagine happiness. To wander in its presence. To feel its warmth. To know its shelter and shade. It’s usually aspirational, but sometimes, and usually accidentally, it arrives as a gift from another. Last night held one those moments… it felt simultaneously old, and ancient, and childlike, and fleeting. We know… it’s a gift, borne by others, and is the most precious thing. We don’t find it, now and again, it finds us, in spite of everything, and smiles. I hope it finds you, even if only for a moment… I hope it does.
Thanks for your thoughts on this, Joshua
The importance of living in the moment.
We are happy and perfect, Paul. But we have to learn to listen to that part of us that’s NOT our mind or intellect *to continue* to be happy. In other words, we have to uncondition ourselves from the layers wrapped around us by our thoughts, emotions, all those reactive moments in life and listen to our inner wise guide. Then, we will relish the neutral state of our Self we were born with and before we started overthinking. Happiness is in being in a neutral state to the world:) Vedanta calls it “sakshi” or the witnessing consciousness.
what can always be... what we are... accept what we are... love what we are... even if we don't know what we are... thank you Paul for your overwhelming beauty always
Thank you for your comment, Forrest
Could this be the very reason poems are written? playing hide and seek a gift - and a curse - by some jealous god
We know how to be happy. Happy is not same as a life of pleasure or hedonism. A deep happiness is freeing and it comes from work of meaning + having gratitude + not giving pain so much importance by holding it or suppressing it. It really is something we can resolve to: just do it.
Thank you, Reena—I think the closing words to your comment say it all: just do it!
Simple yet so hard
Thank you, LeeAnn
Truth...
Thanks, Manuel
Nice
Perhaps it could be we love our dis-ease, it’s familiar territory?
Familiar as in comfortable? Perhaps we’re required to risk something of ourselves for the sake of happiness?
Yup, skin in the game!